being done… September 27, 2007

so i wrote him this five and a half page note because for church we had to think of seven people who had impacted our lives the most and tell them and i didnt think i could say it in person so i wrote it to him… i went to his house and gave it to him. i told him what it was and that it meant alot to me. then as i was leaving i texted him and asked him to please call me after he read it so we could talk about it and so it wouldnt be awkward at school and he doesnt have the nerve to call me and be polite to me… at this point i was thinking about just totally being done with him… then when his friend told me that he got on the bus and said that the note was filled with i love you and i want you back i flipped becasue that is the biggest lie ever… the note said that i still loved him but i was moving on and it said that i missed him sometimes but it never ever said one word about me wanting him back… obviously he didnt get the point of the note because he doesnt care about the rest of what i said… about how he impacted my life… now that i think more and more about it i dont want him back after he has treated me like this… i hope that someone lets him know that i dont want him back and that im done being nice to him because hes not being nice to me hes not even respecting the fact that im hurting… i cant do this anymore i cant be the one always getting hurt… i dont think theres even a chance that i would take him back becasue as soon as he comes back and i accept it he’ll tell me that hes changed and hes not gonna treat me like that ever again… that he’s learned form his mistakes and knowing me i would take him back so im telling myself from the start that i dont want him back….ive learned for my past experiences not to trusta aguy when he says that hes changed… thats some advice that im gonna give to all girls… dont always trust guys when they say theyve changed and if you do end up believing them dont jump right back into things… i did both and im not doing it again!!!! trust is really important in all relationships and when guys screw up they should know that heir chances of being trusted by other girs are fadding away… girls will stick together and listen to each others storries about how guys hurt them. girls talk and things get around so f i were a guy i would just try to be honest and dont sya youve changed when you know you really havent!
xo Anna