i think im finally starting to move away from the fact that were done… i think im starting to realize that maybe he did mean it when he told me he loved me, or maybe he really just needed a break from me and all the problems i bring with me… i know deep in the back of my mind that im still waiting for him, its probably a really stupid thing to do cause i know that you should never wait on something that has a chance it might not ever come back…i keep telling myself not to wait on him, i keep telling myself that hes not worth waiting on if he hasnt already realized what hes missing but theres that thing that me and him had that i just cant give up… theres something that im holding on to and i dont really know what it is but i cant give it up. im moving on away from him for awhile and i guess whatever is supposed to happen will happen. if i was ment to be with him then we will eventually get back together but now is not that time… i will date other people and i will probably be really happy with who ever im with but in the back of my mind im still waiting for that THING to return to me and knock me off my feet. i think the reason im waiting is because i know that when hes ready to be serious again he’ll come back to me and we’ll be happy… its just a matter of time and having to date other people in that time. while im dating other people i could totally just forget what me and him had and fall in love with someone else but theres something stopping me from doing that but i havent figured out what that is yet or how to get rid of it. people keep telling me that i dont need him and that i can live without him and theyre right i dont need him and i can live without him but its me having to believe that and right now im trying to let go but i cant… he ment so much to me and i honestly can say that without him im a diffrent person… im still myself ont he outside for the most part but the inside has totally changed. i have no one to talk to and no one to pour out my heart to every night. something is missing in my heart and i think its him…
xo Anna
